April 28, 2024

Dealing with heartbreak is not as easy as it seems but it is achievable with the right mindset and support from the people around you. The process will hurt, but there’s always a time to heal and that is what you should look forward to. The purpose of this article is to provide you with some tips on how to deal with heartbreak and move on from a relationship in Nigeria. 

Are you ready? Let’s get started! 

1. Allow Yourself to Grieve 

Whether you like to accept it or not, grieving is humanly and we all have the right to grief at any downtime in our lives. You have to understand that the pain you are feeling is normal and any other person in your shoes will feel the same way you do.  It is okay to feel sad, angry, confused, frightened, aggressive or anyhow you want to feel at the moment concerning the situation.  

It would be wise if you do not bottle up your feelings but let them out. Acknowledge your emotions and allow yourself to grieve all you care. Give yourself permission to experience these emotions without judgment. While you may feel like your world has crumbled, you just have to remind yourself that you are unique and there’s always someone out there who will love you. 

2. Seek Support 

Breakups are not something you can bottle up and handle all by yourself. It can lead you to a depressing state and in most cases this is never a funny experience. Lean on friends and family for emotional support. If you care, you can share your experience with them so they can get you fixed up. Talking to someone you trust can provide comfort and perspective. 

Moreover, if you feel overwhelmed, consider seeking professional help from a therapist or counselor. Things are going to begin working out fine only if you allow others to help you out in the journey. There are always people out there who have faced multiple heart breaks in their relationships, you can meet them for help and tips on how to survive the new phase.  

3. Focus on Self-Care 

A heartbreak more often than not, signifies a fresh start. It’s more like an opportunity for you to begin life better than you did in the past. Rather than complaining, regretting and cursing yourself for your mistakes, you just have to brace up, clean up your space and begin again with a new mindset. Focusing on self care can be relieving and an ideal way to heal even faster.  

Take care of your physical and emotional well-being more seriously. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Exercise, eat healthily, get enough sleep, and practice mindfulness or meditation. If possible, read more books, watch movies that pick your interests and make new friends. Doing the things that matter most to you can make you feel better.  

4. Avoid Isolation 

As the popular saying goes “An idle man is the Devil’s workshop” While it’s normal to want some alone time, isolation can exacerbate feelings of sadness and loneliness. In some cases it can lead to depression. After a heartbreak the best thing you can do for yourself is to go get back in the world and live your normal life. Don’t let any circumstances rob you off your joy and happiness. 

Try to maintain social connections and engage in social activities. Get along with people, go out with friends and have fun. No one said it’s going to be easy, you just have to do it because you owe yourself all the happiness in this world.  It may seem awkward at first, but the truth is that you will get along much faster, even quicker than you ever thought possible.  

5. Reflect and Learn 

Heartbreaks often provide you the opportunity to learn from your mistakes and errors. After a heartbreak, take time to reflect on the relationship and what you’ve learned from it. Ask yourself questions like “What did I do wrong?”, ” What would I have done differently”, ” What did I learn from the experience?”, “Am I ready to move on?”, “What do I want in my next relationship?.”

Asking these questions can help you figure out what worked well and what didn’t and if there’s anything you need to improve in your personal life for a better future that lies ahead of you.  Of course, you can use this experience as an opportunity for personal growth and make changes in your next relationship.  However, this is only possible when you reflect and learn.  

6. Set Boundaries 

If possible, establish boundaries with your ex-partner to facilitate the healing process. Keep your distance, limit communication and avoid places or activities that trigger memories of the relationship. It is very important that you break away from your ex partner right after the breakup. In fact, not getting too close too each other is most preferable in times like this.  

You should also stay away from family members, friends or associates that are related to your ex partner to be able to cut all forms of communication for as long as it takes for you to get completely over your ex partner.  By setting boundaries and staying away, not only are you facilitating your healing, but also making room for self respect.  

7. Forgive and Let Go 

Forgiveness doesn’t mean weakness, instead it is a sign of maturity and it is a powerful tool for healing. Holding onto resentment and anger can prolong the pain. Try to forgive your ex-partner and yourself, and focus on letting go of negative emotions. It may seem like a tough decision to make but it is one thing you should do if you value your mental and emotional health.  

No blame games, no grudges, no silent hatred – Only forgiveness and you will be just fine.  There’s no better way of getting over a heartbreak from a relationship than having to forgive your ex partner whether you are the person who made the decision or the other person made the decision, whether you did the right thing and your ex partner is wrong, forgive and let go! 

8. Stay Positive 

Focus on the present and the future. If you want to enjoy the new phase of your life, you should live in the now and not in the past.  A better way of seeking relief is to stay positive and cling on to the plans you have for your future. There will always be another person to love you, not just for anything but for who you are.  Remember that you are unique so you should live by it.  

Surround yourself with positivity and gratitude. You can do so by looking for opportunities for personal and professional growth and you will be glad you did. Life after a heartbreak can be challenging and capable of draining one’s energy but you just have to hold on and stay steadfast to the good things you want for yourself both now and  in the future. 

9. Explore New Interests 

As it is earlier stated, getting back into the world could mean exploring new interests, engaging in new hobbies that spark your interest. This can help distract you from negative thoughts and provide a sense of fulfillment. It could be that you love to sing, write, paint, or even craft handmade stuff. You could do this in your spare time and you will be surprised how creative you are. 

Meanwhile, here are some cool hobbies you could pick up after a breakup that will help boosts your spirit; 

  • Try a new exercise class 
  • Start your own podcast 
  • Learn a new language 
  • Take a dance class 
  • Kick some butt in a martial arts class 
  • Travel to a new city or state that picks your interest 
  • Learn a new recipe 
  • Go hiking 
  • Learn to knit or crochet 
  • Learn photography and so much more 

Exploring any of these hobbies could open doors for newer opportunities. For instance, if you are good at photography, you could train people on that aspect and earn money on the side.  You can also easily become a content creator and make lots of money showcasing your skill and expertise on the internet.  Don’t just get complacent, learn something new to filter the negativity.  

10. Trust the Process 

Time doesn’t heal but you should remember that healing takes time. You need to be patient with yourself and trust that with time, you will heal. Life is in phases, and the heartbreak phase will surely come and go.  You don’t need to be too hard on yourself.  Be flexible and at the same time hope for a brighter future to come.  Truth be told, if you must heal, you need to trust the process. 

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